The gym was empty so me and Morpheus had full use of all the equipment which we put to good work.  I ran for my 40 minute stint and then did some weights, which seems a lot but you see my darling angel of a husband informed me this weekend that yes I had in fact gained a bit of weight, so here I am now trying to become the sexy gorgeous super model that I was last month....no problem, it's a doddle.

So tonight Kiwi Boy came round (with THOSE brown shoes on) and the three of us set off to the Crazy Cuban Cow's place to celebrate her 30th birthday.  There weren't many people at her place but who cares, the woman has got two, yes two huge decks, one at the front overlooking the street and the other off her bedroom.  I'm so jealous, just to think of all the evenings and morning she can sit and slowly sip a cool gin & tonic...BITCH!!  No she's a cutie, she also had on these hot sexy pants...you go girl.

Later on we went across the street to a fabulous seafood restaurant.  On entrance you are faced with lobster claws hanging from the rafters that look more like prehistoric aliens fish things, they're huge and apparently DID exist.  Me personally I'd shit if someone served that up on a plate...HUGE they are!!  Within this restaurant were the fattest people I've ever seen in my life, seriously there was one guy in the corner that looked very familiar, maybe he used to be one of those Weight Watcher people and then regained the weight...I swear the biggest man I've ever seen before.  The trouble is though that as I was gawking at this bloke there was another even fatter woman sat right behind me, I didn't look round, didn't dare, she might have sat on me.

Afterwards the few of us that were left, went on to Serena's which is underneath the famous Chelsea (Sid Vicious) Hotel.  Cosmopolitans were ordered all round  and promptly served to us by a very miserable waitress.  The conversation soon turned incredibly silly and consisted of Morpheus' jock strap which he bought a while ago and insists on wearing at every opportunity.  If you've never seen what they look like then I urge you NOT TO!!  He loves them...ME, I'd rather not witness such underwear on my husband.  Anyway, whilst I was on the loo (toilet) he described how they fit and look by standing up and sticking his butt out and probably displaying exactly where the side straps sit on his thighs....god he's such a show off.  On my return I found Crazy Cuban Cow and her great friend Mary in hysterics, plus Mike (CCC's boyfriend) in a state of absolute shock....how embarrassing!!

Then Crazy Cuban Cow told me how in her old apartment she could never sit on her loo with both knees facing forward, she had to move her legs to one side because her loo was soo small.  Can you believe having a crap in cramp conditions like that, not good Karma!!

A tall pretty black woman had earlier scrounged a cigarette off me, no big deal, so I gave her one.  Now she was back AGAIN, but I was drunk and happy so it didn't bother me, the next thing though is this huge black guy comes strolling over wanting one as well.  I refused, told him he was a cheeky bastard and that's when he decides to plant himself opposite me and flirt...IN FRONT OF MORPHEUS, god these guys are cheeky.  Anyhow by this time CCC and Mike had left to stay the Night at St. Regis Hotel, so it was just the three of us and lurch man in front.  He kept insisting on me giving him a smoke which of course made me more stubborn, he then even tried to take one.  Now I know some of you must think that Morpheus should of intervened but let me tell you this guy was big and I think Morpheus was deep in conversation with Mary...thanks sweetie!!

So anyway the guy was creeping me out a bit, so we paid and left, put Mary in a cab and waited for another.  The all of a sudden I turned around and the big creepy black guy is stood at the gate of the bar just watching us.....HOW FUCKING CREEPY IS THAT???

Morpheus thought I was overreacting but the guy was weird.  I actually poured out the contents of my bag when we got home just in case he'd bugged me or something...this got a huge laugh from Morpheus,

Good night tonight, really enjoyed myself, out on a school night....terribly naughty!!